l Am I ever gonna get to go to Pilates class? l

| July 07, 2004 || 9:48 a.m. |

I left Torin last night. It hurt so much & it even hurts still today. I called Suisse right as I left almost inaudible with tears. He surprisingly understood & offered to get my anything I might from the store. He was making us ding ding last night & I asked for ice cream. He didn�t even get any for himself but he got me my Cherry Garcia.

Well that was the last of my moving too, the roommate wrote me a note saying she wasn�t feeling well asked me to drop the key in the mailbox & leave her a forwarding address so she can send my deposit. I could have sworn she said in the beginning that as long as I did everything on my end she would give it back on the last day in exchange for the key. Ooh well, I guess not. I got everything over to the new house & put it in the garage. What really sucks is everything I have in the garage needs to stay in there. It�s stuff I don�t use & need in a shared environment but I need to move it somewhere cause his other car is being brought back & apparently has to go in the garage. This man has so much shit piled in there that could be tossed away & make so much more room but he makes it sound like the only shit in there that should be moved is mine. Well I have the smallest room in the house & pay the most out of any of us so I should damn well be able to leave that shit in there. There is no storage room in my bedroom at all. I guess I�ll have to see what is going to be done after work today.

Suisse said he might come with me tonight. I know he hates going out late even though karaoke has always started at 9P so I suggested we go to dinner at the Mexican restaurant next door first so it wasn�t like we were leaving late. I hope we do but I won�t get my hopes up cause usually when he says maybe it turns into a �no, maybe next week� type of thing.

My friend Red, the pregnant one naming her baby girl after moi, I received the invite to her baby shower & also an email from her saying how she woke up having contractions in the middle of the night. She said Angel could be arriving in as little as 3 weeks! Wow, it seems like her pregnancy has just flown by but I am sure she doesn�t feel the same. I have become fascinated with watching the Discovery health channel and all of their Childbirth shows: Miracle Babies, Birthday etc. It seems as if that is all they ever have on. I even watched one last night w/ Suisse that was a baby birth/home decorating/trading spaces type show. While the mom & dad were at the hospital a design team came in to do up the babies room as a surprise. I want something like that! Especially since the show pays for everything. How great would that be? I�d love to find out how to get parents-to-be on one of those shows. My cousin could benefit from that so much since she is expecting twins. I still can�t even fathom being a first time mom & TWINS!! That is going to be difficult but she is family & we like to do as much as we can to be there for family. I am hoping that my Dad�s biz will be booming enough for me to move by the time she gives birth.

I want to move so bad right now. California is so damn expensive. The only good I can get from here is cheap education & with as much rent as I am paying now unless I get a nice ass raise in September I will not be able to afford it. Well if Dad gets me my bloodline papers then I will but he�s been saying he will since I graduated high school in �97

My bathroom mate just inherited a paid off house from her Dad in Scottsdale, AZ. She doesn�t think she will move out there but I thought if she doesn�t why couldn�t Suisse & I rent it from her? It would be pure profit for her & cost of living out there is a hell of a lot cheaper there then here. My brain is constantly thinking of new things. If only I could actually do some of them� dammit

Today�s scope~ Don't you just hate learning a valuable lesson? Well, buck up, little camper -- this one happened pretty painlessly. And now you've got this knowledge forever.