l So much for fucking hope l

| December 18, 2004 || 11:36 a.m. |

6:16 last night, I was still at work, my mom called & the MRI showed that the onlyspot they biopsied was the only spot that wasn't cancer. The other two places [shoulder/neck area & behind her chest wall/muscle thingie], is infected or affected. Fuck I don't know how to say it, the cancer is back & here we thought we had just got in the clear from the biopsy. At least they are going to get her started on Chemo right away & they said the stuff they are giving her this time shouldn't make her hair fall out.

I don't know what to think anymore. I hate doctors. I had a great night though, I really kind of made myself have a great night. I didn't cancel my night out & we stayed in drinking red wine. I drank a lot wine. Considering I hadn't eaten lunch & we ended up at the restaurant late & all ready drunk. I probably shouldn't have drove home, I don't really even remember the drive home. Why the hell did I drive home? I am too fucking stubborn for my own good. I know I have to be at work today, I actually need to go take a shower cause I have to leave in a little over an hour. Wish me luck being hung the fuck over on my very first real shift. I think I am closing tonight too which means I will probably not get home or out of there until 11 or something.

Wow, I am too fucking excited about that prospect.

Today's scope~ You want to forget about everything but luring someone closer. Whether it's romantic, platonic or business-oriented doesn't matter. You'll invest some serious energy in this project, and it will definitely work. You can see the beauty in any situation. You could be standing in the middle of a gutted lot on a grimy street and still find something beautiful in it all. That's what people love about you.