l Today's my Friday l

| August 11, 2005 || 11:28 a.m. |

My Internet is up and running as of yesterday. I made sure of it last night when I got home around 1130pm. I was too tired to type an entry and celebrate but it's there. My apartment life is almost complete. I have DshNetw*rk being installed on the 19th. I know that's far off but it's the soonest I could get them to come out, going directly thru DshNetw*rk. I could have gone through an authorized retailer but for some reason I am a fucking idiot and am not doing that. Although... I wonder if I could give my account number to an authorized retailer and have them come out and install it... Perhaps I should ask my little brother about that.

Shit news: All the positive work and paying off on my credit has done nothing but make it worse. I don't know how but my credit score has dropped so low that I might as well be dead or file bankruptcy. I haven't opened anything, started any lines of credit nothing but pay hundreds of dollars and petition to have stuff dropped successfully yet it dropped by a LOT. I don't know what to do. Mary told me to just file bankruptcy and start over but seriously the amounts that are still owed on any of my reports are so not enough to do that. If only I could not pay rent for a month or two and just put that money directly towards those. That's all that it would take well that and a personal bodyguard surveillance to prevent me from spending money.

Good news: My Dad will be here tomorrow & I have the entire day off to spend with him.

I'm wearing a really cute outfit today too. All X clothes of course.

I forgot my cell phone at home today and not only do I need to run home to get that but I also need to clean out my car desperately. My car stinks since I've been smoking so much and there are ashes all in the backseat. Even with all the rain that we've been having my Molly could use a good vacuuming and scrub down. My Dad doesn't know that I started smoking again and I really don't want him to know. I can't handle that disappointment right now. I have way too much depression and sadness right now that's the last thing I need is more disappointment.

There's not enough to keep me busy today. I'm bored off my ass and incessantly keep checking my email[s] hoping to see something that I know won't be there.

Someone play Scrabble with me. I miss playing. I miss a lot of things.

I've been trying to get a new template up. Brucegirl created one for me that I like but when I go to tweek the links and add my site stuff it comes up with errors when I try it here. I can't seem to figure out where and why just yet. It's driving me nuts. ursamajor was going to create one for me but I haven't wanted to bug her about it. I have a tendency to bug a lot when I want something. One of my character flaws that I am becoming all too familiar with and I find does nothing but hurt my relationships. I am trying to work on that. You'd think after so long [this] I'd have all ready fixed that characteristic.

Almost lunch time. I should get some stuff done before I start my running around.