Each person approaches death in their own way, bringing to this last experience their own uniqueness. What is listed here is simply a guideline, a road map. Like any map there are many roads arriving at the same destination, many ways to enter the same city.

Use this guideline while remembering there is nothing concrete here; all is very, very flexible. Any one of the signs in this booklet may be present; all maybe present; none maybe present. For some, it will take months to separate from their physical body, for others only minutes.

Death comes in its own time; in its own way.

Death is as unique as the individual who is experiencing it.

If the following signs were to be put on a timetable, a very flexible time table, we could say these changes begin one to three months before death occurs. The actual dying process often begins within the two weeks prior to death. There is a shift that occurs within a person, which takes them from a mental processing of death to a true comprehension and belief in their own mortality. Unfortunately, this understanding is not always shared with others.

As the knowledge that �yes, I am dying� becomes real, a person begins to withdraw from the world around them. This is the beginning of separation, first from the world-no more interest in newspapers or television, then from people- no more neighbors visiting: �Tell aunt Jessie I don�t fee like company today,� and finally from the children, grandchildren and perhaps even those persons most loved.

This is becoming a time of withdrawing from everything outside of one�s self and going inside. Inside where there is sorting out, evaluating one�s self and one�s life. But inside there is only room for one.

This processing of one�s life is usually done with the eyes closed, so sleep in-creases. A morning nap is added to the usual afternoon nap. Staying in bed all-day and spending more time asleep then awake becomes the norm. This appears to be just sleep but knowing that important work is going on inside on a level of which �out-siders� aren�t aware.

With this withdrawal comes less of a need to communicate with others. Words are seen as being connected with the physical life that is being left behind. Words lose their importance; touch and wordlessness take on more meaning.

Food is the way we energize our body. It is the means by which we keep our body going, moving, alive. We eat to live. When a body is preparing to die, it is perfectly natural that eating should stop. This is one of the hardest concepts for a family to accept.

There is a gradual decrease in eating habits. Nothing tastes good. Cravings come and go. Liquids are preferred to solids. �I just don�t feel like eating. � Meats are the first to go, followed by vegetables and other hard to digest foods until even soft foods are no longer eaten.

It is okay not to eat. A different kind of energy is needed now. A spiritual energy, not a physical one, will sustain from here on.

Sleeping is most of the time now. A person can�t seem to keep their eyes open. They can, however, be awakened from that sleep. There is literally one foot in each world. A person often becomes confused, talking to people, and about places and events, that are unknown to others. They may see and converse with loved ones who have died before them. There may be picking at the bedclothes and agitated arm movements. There is a seeming aimlessness to all physical activity. Focus is changing from this world to the next; they are losing their grounding to earth.

(I�m skipping all the physical changes section)

Sometimes there is a surge of energy. A person may talk clearly and alertly when before there had been disorientation. A favorite meal might be asked for and eaten when nothing had been eaten for days. A person might sit in the living room with relatives and visit when they hadn�t wanted to be with anyone for quite awhile. The spiritual energy for transition from this world to the next has arrived and it is used for a time of physical expression before moving on. This surge of energy is not always as noticeable as the above examples but in hindsight it can usually be recognized.

The one to two weeks signs that were present earlier become more intense as death approaches.

Restlessness can further increase due to lack of oxygen in the blood.

The breathing patterns become slower and more irregular. Breathing often stops for ten to fifteen or even thirty to forty-five seconds before resuming again.

Congestion can be very loud. It can be affected by positioning on one side or the other. It still comes and goes.
The eyes may be open or semi-open but not seeing. There is a glassy look to them, often tearing.

The hands and feet now become purplish. The knees, ankles, and elbows are blotchy. The underside of the arms, legs, back and buttocks also can be blotchy.

Generally a person becomes non-responsive [unable to respond to their environment] sometime prior to death.

How we approach death is going to depend upon our fear of life, how much we participated in that life, and how willing we are to let go of this known expression to venture into a new one. Fear and unfinished business are two big factors in determining how much resistance we put into meeting death.

The separation becomes complete when breathing stops. What appears to be the last breath is often followed by one or two long spaced breaths and then the physical body is empty. The owner is no longer in need of a heavy, non-functioning vehicle.