l So many times that I just wanna scream l

| November 08, 2006 || 5:28 p.m. |

I have a new actress crush, you can check her out here.

I'm doing all right. I got my roommate a job at X and the same day he started I got the call from the other mall that I got the Sales Lead position and I start Monday! So I will be doing entry level mgmt at the other mall next week! I don't know exactly how I will be able to work ODS into this new schedule which I have yet to receive.

My mom's birthday is coming up pretty quickly and I think that is affecting my mood and making me more depressed again. It has to be a cross between that and my weight. I've gained so much weight since September that it's not nice to my wardrobe nor my ego. It's not easy for me to lose weight either. Now that I am not drinking so much I think that might help but it's not going to be an easy thing to do not matter what.

I don't know what else to write about. I've figured out that I don't tolerate having a friend/guy friend as a roommate all too well... I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I have to drive him everywhere right now and take him with me when I go to work at night or whereever I am going. His cell phone isn't working right now either so if he is not with me then I have no clue where he is or where he will be anywhere. I feel a great sense of burden right now and because of that I think I tend to be very short and rude to him right now. My temp roomie was great but then again she had a cell phone, truck and made good money. I have to wait until he gets his first paycheck two weeks from this coming Friday before I can get anymore money from him and that sucks. I really don't know what he is going to do once I move to the other mall. I don't think I will be able to take him to work everyday or even pick him up. We will have totally different schedules I'm sure which I would like to say is his problem but then again it is my problem because I went against my own judgement and let him move in with no job and only giving me half of what would be his rent up front. It's not like I have kept a log of how much money I've spent on him but I do need to go through all my charges and write down how much beers I've paid for for him, cigarettes and food because I will get that money back!

It's really frustrating but I don't know what to do. I'll give it a little time and see if he can actually be responsible and get his shit in line. I seriously hope though that once he gets me paid back that he gets either a new car or fixes his truck and does not end up hanging out every single time or place that I am at. I get bored with people very easily which is yet another reason that I am not dating anyone right now.