l Since I've updated finally - please let the Kings beat the Stars! l

| October 25, 2007 || 7:00 p.m. |

Well, well, well... If it isn't me on the D again. Don't get too comfortable I can't type long. There has been sooooooooo much going on in my life that I just wouldn't have the time and the D wouldn't have the bandwidth for me to catch all ya'll up to speed in great detail.

I'm seeing a couple guys right now. We'll call one Coolhand & the other GM. I'm not very creative in my older years (*yes turned 28 four days ago*).

Coolhand works at the restaurant/bar that I frequent so much as to I know and chat with the regs and all the bartender/waitstaff. Ya, they all know about him and I too. It's a fun place and he's a young fun guy. A total pothead skater punk and barely a year younger then me but we have a ton of fun together. He makes me laugh and calls me pigtails (I have the short hair that makes two ever so apparently adorable pigtails). He is obsessed with my ass which as large as it's gotten in the past year I am very pleased with this obsession. He got out of a 6/7 yr relationship though not too long ago and so he does have some issues there. *fact his gf cheated on him with a black guy*. He's not very trusting of the female group right now. He is very open with me though and we talk a lot about just stuff. I know it's not going to get really serious because of this reason but I'm just all about having fun right now.

Now this brings me to GM. I met him shortly after I first started seeing Coolhand. I really kind of blew him off or ignored him when we did go out for the first two months but when things cooled with Coolhand, for about 3 weeks I really started realizing that I liked GM. He about 5 yrs older then me and *duh* a GM of a pretty nice restaurant in a very nice area/city.

The thing is though, Coolhand has come back from out of a *fog*, let's say, and now I've spent the past two nights at his place. Okay wait. We stopped talking for about two weeks, stopped sleeping over etc, for no reason that I knew of. Well I started seeing GM a lot more and spend 3-4 nights w/ him the week going into my bday then Thurs or Wednesday I ended up talking to Coolhand and staying at his place. I knew I shouldn't sleep with him when I went over there but come on... seriously? I knew that was a promise to myself I couldn't keep. Sure enough I spent the rest of the weekend after that with GM. Well actually not spending so much. He didn't stay the night the night of my bday party (which I was disappointed about not getting bday booty but whatever I don't even remember the drive home or that last half of the night so whatever). I haven't slept with GM or spent the night with him since I slept with Coolhand. Am I avoiding him? Kind of I suppose. I had told him I was coming over last night but as soon as Coolhand called and invited me over I lied to GM saying that I was exhausted and had started to fall asleep on my couch.

Apparently I like Coolhand more then GM. But is it just cause he's more fun in a younger reckless dangerous kind of way? I'm almost afraid so. GM I know would want to get more serious and eventually become eclusive, he's definitely more responsible and mature. Perhaps I'm really more afraid that I still deep down will only settle for Suisse as a life partner.

Hm... Yeah, we still talk/text/flirt. He is still promising to come out here to visit me but ever promise is made again because he just can't afford it right now. I really don't think he'll ever before to afford it still living in the OC. He'll definitely never be able to buy me a ring unless he does move out here... will that ever happen? Who the hell but gd knows.

So those are my boys. One's more a man then the other but sometime all a girl wants is the bad boy, not the good man. What I really want, secretly is just the one.

Wow, random writing ramblings. I miss this damn place. My Supergold is probably expired now. I need to come around more often. I need to head out from the library now but trust that I'll be back.

I still have to fill you all in on crazy slut roommate I have. Seriously, I think I must attract losers subconsciously.