l These boots are made for walkin... l

| February 26, 2009 || 1:12 a.m. |

Quite a lot has happened in the past week. I almost walked out of my Saturday Karaoke gig. Some little twit, skank, whatever you wanna call the barely 21 lil (hardly lil, she should not have been wearing those cut off shorts, tiny mid-drift baring tank & vest, yes a vest), bitch. She has the audacity to come up to me & ask when her and her whore partner were gonna sing again. Mind you I have about 22+ singers and close to half of them had not even sung yet. But this twit (my new favorite word), dares to tell me that "(the owner), said that he wants us to be next cuz we're keeping the crowd entertained". Ummm... first of all, that's my job thank you & if the owner wants you ho's to be next, he can tell me himself. At least that is what I wish I would have said. On top of that I had a singer from last week that had bought me a shot of patron to move his song up, last week and yet somehow he thought that shot would keep him as next for this week... Hello? McFly? Bueller? Anyone home? Sorry but that was last week... This is a whole new day. So as this guy's arguing with me about when he's gonna sing & what he has to do to get to sing (it's only an hour left til the bar closes & more then half my people haven't been able to sing once due to the excessive dance breaks the twits & owner have asked for), & a girl that's part of the *crew* insists that her friend (group actually), must sing this particular michael j song that they always do (surprise to me since this is the first time I've heard them do it) but I tell her that there's no way... til she asks how much. Of course I say that $$ talks. Seriously in this business that's the only way you'll get up the list faster & guarantee your singing when the owner micromanages who & what is played... I thought I was the DJ & it was my job to cater to the crowd & also get the singers up? Hmmm. I guess I got my job description wrong. Well I should back track & mention that he had come up to me in the beginning of the night & said that although he was critiquing my previous nights work but he wanted to hear more "upbeat" music & less music interruptions with bringing singers up in the middle or cutting off a song. Well excuse the fuck out of me but do you know how hard it is to guarantee that a person let alone a group of people are going to get to the stage & be ready in time when I call them less then a minute til their song starts?? or the other song ends? It's impossible. I explain politely that I was trying to get all my new first time singers in at the last minute because they (mgmt) wanted so many dance breaks earlier in the night. Then he proceeds to tell me that he hadn't recognized any of the songs I played earlier in the beginning of my shift. Well that was an easy one, I just showed him the handwritten list that some of the crowd wrote down that they wanted to hear, it's not my damn fault that old fuck didn't know what was being played on K*ss or whatever hiphop radio station they listen to. I was just playing what the crowd wanted & that's what he hired me for correct?? Just checking. Oh I can't wait to get out of this micromanaged, double talking hell hole. It's about twenty mins from my house & I'm here 3 nights a week, well 5 if you count my other gig which is right down the street. It's taking a toll on my gas & now on my patience. What do you want? A DJ or Karaoke host? I can be both but let me make sure my singers are taken care of as well or else they won't come back to sing ever again. Seriously fucking frustrating.

Next! I have a gig closer to home that's interested in my Saturday nights but they are low balling me & I don't want to take that much of a paycut just to be closer to home. I'm going to work some magic & do a little negotiating or play hardball with them tomorrow. I want it & I am worth every penny they will be spending especially compared to what they currently have & I know they desperately want to get away from. I get to use my "boss" has my hardball since he has the necessary equipment but hopefully they'll take it. They do good business so they can definitely afford a higher quality DJ. Me.

Let me see... Do I really want to get into my sex life? I'm not sure cuz I don't know who will read this & I certainly don't want anyone to get hurt. I've caused so much pain & heartache to Coolhand that I just couldn't handle him finding out certain things. Let's just say I'm trying to work things out with him, I love him, I really do but I can't escape the fact that right now I want other things & a relationship (with him) is not really what I want. Not right now. Eventually, once he gets his life back & gets back to who he really is. I mean I guess it says a lot that I'm still there for him during the hard times but what does it say about me that I really don't want to be with him, just help him thru it?? I don't know what to make of that. I honestly don't. I want to pursure other intestests. Does that make me a horrible person? I hope not. I'm there for him more then I should, I think but that's just because I do care about & love him. I'm just not in love with him right now. I know I've talked about how needy & clingy he's gotten & perhaps because it takes me so much back to Milwaukee that I just can't cope with it (I'm not doing the link cause I really don't care to research my older entries right now so if you feel the need & have the time you can do it on your own, Sorry).

I suppose if I have the time I can type my entries onto notepad & then copy them on the net when I have the access, but if I did multiple entries would you not read them all but only the current one? Just curious. I really don't open my laptop til I go to work anyways anymore. Just seems pointless. I have had the thought to see if I could talk to S*PCs to see if they would take my 714 number & just change it into a wireless card - I never use my Cali phone but I am paying for two lines. Why couldn't I just pay for one line & one wireless card? Seems like it might be the same price or similiar & at least then I'd use the wireless card a hell of a lot, anywhere. That'd be great. Perhaps next time I have some time off (during regular business hours which is next to never), I can call & inquire about that inquiry.

I've gotten hooked on that twilight sage thing that's been sweeping the tweens all over the nation. A friend of mine let me borrow her book & I swear it took me over a month of two to actually pick it up but I finished it in less than 24 hours. Actually I started it around 2-3 in the afternoon when I woke up & didn't put it down until about 5am last thursday morning. So 15 hours? I finally found the 2nd book at Sam's but I was very disappointed that they didn't have the little regular sized paperback but the large printed one that makes me feel like I am illiterate & can only see the large bold print. To be honest it's so much easier for me to hold & read the normal sized paperbacks. This is just a pain in the ass & a lot more conspicuous. I have no problem reading a book while sitting a bar. I know it's funny & perhaps very antisocial or strange to read a book while sitting in or at a bar but I really don't care. I am not here to socialize with everyone nor do I care to right now, I just want to read my damn book if I am not busy with singers or a bunch of retarded song requests. Please leave me be thank you. Kidding. I get paid to do the work that I do but sometimes when I am in my zone I just really don't want to work that hard, as if it's hard at all. But whatever. I'm rambling. I'm gonna see if I can sneak out a bit early. I think my singers have finally dwindled. This has actually been the busiest Wednesday night that I've had here which is pathetic but it's hopefully a good sign that I might get to stay here on Wednesdays for a bit longer, well at least til I can find a gig closer to home to replace this night. I have a few leads I just need to get business cards... Ooh shit! That's what I was going to do tonight since I have internet!! Fuck! Me! Okay, I think this entry has been sufficient for now. I'll do more Friday no matter how busy I am, Promise. Love ya'll!!