l Deep Down in the Delta Blue l

| Wednesday, May. 15, 2002 || 1:36 p.m. |

I am feeling rather restless as I sit here at my desk staring blankly into the cyber tube supplied by my Ooh so generous employer. My shoulders ache with the pains of the world that has been thrusted upon my being. Back twinges, screaming out for that healing touch provided by your hands, caressing, pondering, discovering the sweetness that is my soul. Mapped out by our passions, attractions, dreams and visions... Sugar plums, candy corn, sticky sweet cotton draped over our heads, sheltering us from the rain.

I am afraid to reveal myself complete, not out of shame nor regret but innocence. I want you to see me as you do and not as I have been while not in your presence. This is why I do not give you my url.

I have had things that I have written used against me. Misconstrued, Misconceived, misreceived, misinterpreted, just pain thrown in my face. I have strange thoughts that run through this head of mine and not all of them are sane rational ones. You would probably get bored anyways... I have writted a lot and there are some really long entries at that.

If you would like to, I mean really curious and feel the need and or desire to... I will... just please do not use anything against me.

I love you... I want to share the world with you. I will tell you everything you want to know...

Give you my deepest, darkest secrets if you so desire.

*My heart aches, my body writhes as you enter my mind with elegance and grace, Subtle smoothe as you unwrap the lace from around pandoras box. Trickling over with vast dreams like droplets of pixie dust floating over us in incandescent bubbles.*

I find myself thinking about you increasingly often on such perpetual days as these. The distance of hearts brings excruciating restlessness.

Every tingle brings the longing to entangle my sweetened soul with yours.

If sempiternity could disprove my overwhelming senses, I would not know existence at this moment today.

I may never understand all of life's mysteries and trials, but I do know that I would enjoy nothing more than to watch these take place for the remainder of my days by your side.