l Party at the big top l

| Monday, Feb. 03, 2003 || 10:49 a.m. |

I sneaked into the d~land world this morning & I had to comment on this . I am not that big into the Political scene or do I really care to experience war in my lifetime but it now seems inevitable. Every generation must be forced to feel the wrath of political psuedo-religious bullshit hypocrisy & blood shed. My only concerns are the actual thought of the U.S being bombed� I never really even fathomed that we could be hit by anything. It is just so hard to comprehend that we might be under siege at some point. I mean what would happen? I have seen footage of war in movies & television, the destruction, mass murder etc. All on the grounds of other countries� I know about Pearl Harbor, the people we lost I have seen it first hand at the memorial on Oahu. A great majority of our technology comes from Silicone Valley; we would be hindered severely if some country decided to take it out. I have friends & family up in that area� It scares me to think that something like that could happen. Is there anywhere to seek refuge from the potential terrorist or wartime attacks? Should we all flee to the Midwest with out letting the media know? Lol I can�t foresee anyone bombing Wisconsin � what would they want to accomplish? Taking out the Miller Brewing Company? Put the town out of their misery by bombing the Miller Stadium while the boring Brewers are practicing? I mean please what is there out there that would devastate us if destroyed?

Ahh so that was my elusive Thursday morning entry that never got posted� I had my lil housewarming party� it was a blast! But I do have to mention that only 4 of my friends actually showed up� All of my Neighbors came over so it was up to 15 people at some points� It really gets you started thinking when all of your friends� flake & most don�t even bother to call or acknowledge that they missed out� Well I got over it rather quickly with the help from my neighbors & all of their house warming gifts� no wine but the other �w� was there� lots of it in fact. I am not a big �smoker� but when the occasion arises I can smoke with the rest of them just fine. There is a fair amount of drama amongst the neighbors. The pregnant hippy below & over in my building has the same due date I would have had & consistently drinks & smokes� I didn�t see her drinking partially due to the fact that I had made comments about not being able to drink when I was preg� I don�t understand people who drink & smoke consistently� I mean I have read somewhere that an occasional glass of red wine late in the pregnancy can be okay but occasionally does not mean daily or weekly. Huh I smoked cigarettes but I was planning on quitting� but I never touched hard liquor as I have heard she has been known to do & I sure as hell never did a drug� that is quite sad & I only pray that her child is born with no defects or illnesses.

I am really happy with my neighbors� the chef & his wife invited me over for ribs on Sunday night. I haven�t eaten ribs in years mostly cause of my weird thing with eating off a bone but I sucked it up & grubbed regardless � ya just can�t pass a rib dinner by I mean come on! I also made the best pizza in the world for my party� Thanks all to Trader Joe�s! I saut�ed spinach, red peppers, onions, garlic, & cilantro (my absolute favorite herb in the world) one in a spicy olive oil & the other with regular olive oil� both covered with mozza & pepperoni then the toppings above & more mozza� Mmmm� they were both divine! So I have promised to make then again & bring them to Cheers to share� I am going to make them again tonight just for myself� I am thinking of more stuff to add to it as well �Ooh did I forget to mention the vodka sauce in lieu of pizza sauce? That makes a big difference! I am getting hungry just thinking about it again. Maybe some roasted corn, bbq�d chicken or marinated chicken instead of pepperoni�

Okay I have to get back to work� I know I am forgetting to mention something� Let me think, Ooh yeah more porn~fun� I don�t remember who was there & who the idea came from but sometime during the tail end of the party �we� decided to buy pay per view porn� it really sucked now that I think of it� not that I am racist or whatever but it was all gangster African American style porn� like gang banging but they never once showed the actual penetration� that is like the best part! At least in my personal opinion� I don�t think I even saw the �goods� the entire time, just the back of heads giving some oral loving & hinny shots� I do know it was my idea to tape it all & once the KJ master & her bf left I brought the toys out to play (by that time I was all alone) then I woke up on my couch watching a blue screen� I have been masturbating a lil too much recently ~ I think it�s about damn time I find the real thing before I get desensitized from all the Hmmmming!