l Is being a roommate closely related to dating? l

| Wednesday, March 20, 2002 || 4:26 p.m. |

At the young age of twenty-two, I have had the privilege, sometimes karma, of having roommates. My first experience was a rather frightening one at that. One would think that I�d have learned a lesson the first time I was bent over and taken for a backdoor cruise. Technically, my first roommate experience was similar to the Real World that is ever so popular on MTV; seven people under one roof that works together etc� Drugs, sex and rock and roll, well not really, we worked together for a cultish door to door-pyramid company. Due to the fact that most of us made next to no money in this venture, they convinced many to leave their homes for a more humbling experience. Crammed into a ghetto junkyard in the slums of Huntington Beach, I was honored with this brief living situation due to the slight mishap of being kicked out of my mom�s house. I resided in this horrifying situation for a little more than 2 months, sharing a room with a verbally/emotionally abusive boyfriend, 10 yrs. my senior. My only salvation was to run away moving in with a Puerta-Rican, New Yorker whom I met while looking at apartments. Having known her for 2 weeks this began the worst experience ever! Pot-smoking, gangster-banging, thief got knocked up by one of her homeboys and left me with a premature lease and no electricity. This was a shell of an apartment to say the least. I was young with little to nothing in my own personal belongings, let alone no real money or credit. I had one large entertainment center, which remained empty, a decent bathroom, no real stuff in the kitchen, lord knows the fridge was empty most of the time as well, and my roommate�s room consisted of a mattress on the floor, a t.v. and a v.c.r. Thankfully I can say that it never got much worse than that� The next apartment came hand in hand with a lesbian relationship that lasted almost 2 years. The apartment(s) themselves were magnificently located in the L.B.C. Although both were under the supervision of �family�, I have to say that I enjoyed living behind a lesbian couple/landlords much more so than the anal-retentive fags that were our first apartment�s owners� This is not because of it being womyn, honestly it isn�t! Ms. Professional-lesbo and her better half, Ms.EMT-dyke, were a lovely couple to look at and live with� Sharing common area can be scary at least so proved the nude gaymen I ran into often in the courtyard of our first rental� The relationship ended with my heart empty, credit destroyed (remember just above I had mentioned no credit??), and leaving behind a fabulous apartment with gated parking� In the gay ghetto of Long Beach; I was right down the street from everything and everyone I hung out with� Since sucking up my pride (what I had left of it after being lied to and cheated on for nearly 2 years), I ended up at home and neglecting my buds on 2nd street and in the fashion industry, not too mention all my fellow �family� members! I can�t really bitch too much, because I had previously been neglecting my people of the South, so it was now their time to be graced with my presence again! Lucky for them huh? This brings me to up to date with the present living arrangement. Ms. All about kings is a sweetheart, I am not disputing that fact� Nor do I mind that she is absent for a majority of the week, but for goodness sake! CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF! HALF-EATEN FOOD DOES NOT BELONG IN THE SINK! DISHES SHOULD BE PUT IN THE DISHWASHER! DO NOT LEAVE CRUMBS ON THE COUNTER JUST CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF, ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU ARE NEVER HERE I DO NOT WANT TO SEE IT!