l Dead cells give way to new skin l

| Wednesday, Feb. 05, 2003 || 4:34 p.m. |

You are out of my life, been erased, deleted, rubbed-out, snuffed, wiped, scraped out; effaced; obliterated, crossed out. AWOL, astray, away, disappeared, gone, lacking, left behind, left out, lost, mislaid, mislaid, misplaced, not present, omitted, short, unaccounted for, wanting�

I am much happier after stripping what all I had of you from my existence. You are no longer the face I smile upon while busying myself at work; the tee I sleep in at night; my last thought before I drift into slumber & definitely no longer the lingering reason my fingers wander down towards my lips�{/sigh}

I have finished removing the memories from my mind, sight & hear shot� well mostly. I still need to find someone to erase that message I recorded on my machine (before it was erased from my vm). I don�t think I can manage� I am afraid I�ll listen to it, you again then be right back where I was before you last words slapped me in the face. I am ready now� more so than I ever imagined before� ready for life, real love, real success & a real future� no longer trying to fill the void with dreams or illusions of grandeur� I am ready to spread my angelic wings & fly� fly high above your petty, materialistic hum drum, pathetic, pitiful shroud you call {asshole} Milwaukee {/asshole}

There are options I know this� I just need to carpe momentum� seize the moment right? Just checking� I did see Cornflake Girl online today� as soon as I add her to my aim list there she pops in� how funny is that? Lol She said that she will come over tonight & call me but hence her name it remains to be seen. I do hope so though� I haven�t seen her since I returned from visiting Wisconsin back in June. I have heard about what she has been up to but never actually from her. She is getting married but her fianc�e has been shipped to Iraq or something like that� my prayers go out to him� in fact I am meeting more & more women my age that have girl/boyfriends across in the �war�. I am now praying for someone other than myself� I pray for us as a nation, a united nation, even if we divide amongst ourselves with our �cultures�, ethnicities, preferences, even our laws keep us from being equal as a nation� war really puts that all into perspective now doesn�t it? The shuttle explodes, our towers have fallen� we discriminate against ourselves just as much as we terrorize innocent families in innocent towns that skirt the evil �enemy� headquarters or bunkers� what are we gonna do when they begin to do the same to us? I know I never thought about it before a few entries ago� Can we handle the tides of death & destruction ebbing back towards our own shores?