l Ever feel like the world is your private toilet bowl? I didn't think so... l

| Thursday, Dec. 19, 2002 || 12:26 p.m. |

No entry today folks, I am way too sick to write much at all. I can't even keep water down it is not a pretty site, I am stuck at work with no car! :(

I think I made plans to go skiing or something last night with MushMush. He shaved his head & I almost didn't recognize him at Cheers... The whole gang was there and feeding me alcohol intravenously I think... lol I got too trashed thank god MM gave me a ride I don't think I could have walked as I planned.

I had a Pat Benatar night, I sang so many of her songs last night & of course u ought a know for my mom so her precious Aussie could hear me sing... Geez I think I am just as bad as my mom... When I bring people to cheers I never bring them more than once! lol Every time she has gone was for the same reason for her new beau to hear me sing... lol I think the only time other than that was for my going away party.

Ugh! Bunches was there, everyone was there... I know I was there for the sheer fact that I have to worst hang over of my life right now... I am serious, I don't know if it was because I was sick & my immune system is low or what. I don't recall drinking that much, but I guess I am wrong...

I have 5 days off starting Saturday my car is getting spiffy. Everything is getting fixed for really cheap too! The arsehole ex~bf of my mom's friend is giving me the major hookup, new brakes, rotors, chrome rims, fixing my passenger door (finally) and the lil light doohickey that doesn't stop flashing. I just hate being without my car... It makes me feel trapped. I was supposed to go meet my Webmaster, funny how I am backing out of this one... I have no way of getting there and feel like too much hell frozen over to go anywhere other than bed. I think she would have cancelled anyways... her pup got his by a pellet gun? In downtown la? I didn't think anyone used those anymore let alone a drive by pelleting... that is too funny. Ooh and she is sick too, stomach flu or something.

OMG! I just remembered that last night I was talking to Rockstar last night about Milwaukee and how I wish I could just be back with him no matter where I was... Well he offered to pay for me to move back to Wisconsin or he could show Milwaukee how to make bank working at home (with me here). Rockstar owns his own Internet business doing something with web stuff. All I know is he makes damn good money running his own shiznit. He always buy shots & drinks for everyone in our party and then some... but wasn't that sweet of him?? I thought so, he just wants me to be happy & he knows how much I miss Milwaukee... damn it I think I am going to cry! lol

I don't think my body can even produce tears at this point, I wonder if a redbull would be good? That usually does the trick.

I think I am invisible right now. The auto motion detector light thingy keeps going out. What does that mean? Am I dead? Am I asleep at my desk? I don't know I'll just stick with the invisible thing I like that one.

Well so much for no entry to day� leave me a note will ya? I know y�all stop in here to take a gander into my existence & happenings� grow some cojones will ya?

**It�s all with love in my heart & a smile on my face**

Ooh yeah and I am worth exactily: $1,427,830.00. Can I get that in tens & twenties?